In Defence Of Facebook

(I wrote this for my school newspaper and decided that I may as well publish it here. Hope you enjoy!)
You’re sitting at the computer. You should be doing an English essay due tomorrow, but instead you’re looking at Facebook. It’s not that you purposefully didn’t do the essay, or even that you forgot; you knew you would have to do it at some point, but there was always something better to do. So now here we are; the due date is a matter of hours away and you’re on Facebook. Soon enough, the inevitable happens. A parent walks into your room, and even though you switch immediately to a pre-prepared Word document, it’s too late. Facebook’s blue has become instantly recognisable over the last decade. Resistance is futile; the parent shrieks “Why aren’t you doing something worthwhile with your time?!” Your world comes crashing down around you, and everyone is doomed.

Don’t worry! You can prevent this apocalypse if you just keep reading, because by the end of this article you will be fully clued up on why Facebook is not a waste of time at all.

1. Planning events has never been easier. While it is true that the occasional party gets a little out of control and ends up on the news due to the entire world being invited to the Facebook event, most of the time it’s perfectly safe. Remember the days of phoning someone to arrange things? Well now you can do it all without any social contact at all! Great.

2. Leaving your homework at school no longer stands as an excuse. Sorry! Facebook is really useful for finding out what you were supposed to do (and also for asking other people for their answers… even better.)

3. Oops, you forgot to say happy birthday to all 50 people who had birthdays today. That’s okay, you can say it on Facebook instead and they will never know you had originally forgotten. (Bonus, you even get a helpful reminder.) Facebook, keeping friendships alive.

4.       Staying in contact with people who live far away is super easy. Gone are the days of handwriting lengthy, formal letters, or even emails. With Facebook, communicating is so much quicker, easier, and more convenient (although it is still nice to receive handwritten letters).

5. In the days of yore, people used to turn up to events all wearing exactly the same outfit. With all the girls in matching dresses, and the boys in matching kilts, not only was it awkward, it was also nearly impossible to tell who anyone was. Thankfully, with the advent of Facebook, this problem has been solved and dress pages now ensure that everyone looks different, but equally fab.

So now you know. If your parents ever tell you to get off Facebook and do something more worthwhile, just tell them why it’s actually a very effective use of your time, and then get back to procrastinating writing that English essay.

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